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Some Die of Drinking Water Some die of drinking water, And some of drinking beer, Some die of constipation, And some of diarrhea. But of all the world's diseases, There's none that can compare, With the drip, drip, drip of the syphilitic prick Of a British Grenadier* When he goes forth in battle, His weapon in his hand, The lasses fall like cattle, There's none can make a stand. But when the campaign's over, It's then he feels so queer, With the drip, drip, drip of the syphilitic prick Of a British Grenadier And when he does retire, To take his well-earned rest, There burns an ancient fire, To do what he does best. And yet, the truth is bitter, There's one thing he does fear, It's the drip, drip, drip of the syphilitic prick Of a British Grenadier. I like the girls who say they will, And I like the girls who won't. I hate the girls who say they will, And then they say they won't. But of all the girls I like the best, I may be wrong or right, Are the girls who say they never will, But look as though they might. *or Hash-House Harrier
SAMBO WAS A LAZY COONSambo was a lazy coon, Who like to sleep in the afternoon, So tired was he, so tired was he. Off to the forest he would go, Swinging his chopper too and fro, When along came a bee, a bloody great bumble bee, Bzz, bzz, bzz, bzz. Go away you bumble bee, I ain't no rose, I ain't no bleeding flower, get off my bastard nose. Get off my nasal organ, don't you come near. If you want a bit of fanny, you can see I haven't any, And you'll get no asshole here. Asshole rules the Navy, Asshole rules the Navy, Asshole rules the navy, But you'll get no asshole here. When I was young I had no sense. Caught my bollocks on a fence. To the doctor I did go. Me balls and all I had to show. He sat me on a stool And he lopped off my tool. When I went home, my father laughed To see two balls without a shaft. Asshole rules the Navy. Asshole rules the Navy. Asshole rules the Navy, But you'll get no asshole here.